I love you legs
How often do we shame our bodies simply because we don’t like the view? I was around 5 when I started to be discontent with the shape and bruising of my legs. Coming from an extremely conservative background, modesty was a doctrine, and I was taught that if my body was “sexy” or “hot” I was causing my guy friends to sin. Shorts to your knees, body covered. .
My personality is prone to shame, and shame for my legs always hits me hard. In middle school, I started to get mad at my knees for always breaking, in high school I was pissed I had to give up sports because of my legs. They became uglier and uglier to me the more I resented them for the pain they caused me. Ugh I hated crutches.
College came around and my legs prevented me from running (something I love to do), hiking became difficult in my early 20’s and over the past 12 years my legs have slowly deteriorated more and more and more until they just stopped. .
At 32, my legs are no longer on my body to serve me.. I am here to serve them. 24 hours are in a day, and my legs are a battle each and every hour- changing their mind every minute. The sensations I feel in my legs are like this: dragging through quicksand, my legs have been dipped in concrete and I carry that weight, a thousand ants biting my feet with every step I take, flames consuming me while Uncontrollably itching- wishing I could just shed my skin. My knees hyperextend and hurt more daily, meniscuss need to be repaired, aching and muscle spasms, electricity, that feeling when your legs are waking up- I have that ALL the time from my knees down, sometimes people touch my legs and my whole body spasms, they like to jerk and dance at night.. they keep me on (ha or off!) my toes.
At 32 I love my legs. I have moved past the shame I felt for wearing compression socks, my bruising, the bracing I wear, the segway,the ugly way they drag.. I love this photo of my legs! Every day I tell them how strong they are, I thank them for what they CAN do, apologize for the former hate, I nurture them with cold water and give them compression and sit when they tell me to sit. I thank them for teaching me to slow down,love their shape and love the view.